Goulash of the past few weeks

I participated in my first triathalon relay on October 4th. I was a part of the "Dynamically Dysfunctionals". My 500 meter swim felt like it took me 30 minutes to complete. I used 3 different strokes. I knew I was screwed when I switched from freestyle to breast. Tried to switch back to freestyle and couldn't lift my arms out of the water. I was REALLY screwed when I went to backstroke. I HATE the backstroke. I always imagine Greenpeace coming after me chanting, "Save the Whale! Save the Whale!" I finished in 15:08. Respectfully better than the 30 minutes I had in my head, disappointingly 1 minute slower than at the height of my training over the summer. But I still have a goal to do that tri - the whole thing - next year. I've got 11 months left of procrastinating the training for the bike, swim and run.

I got a present in the mail from Dusty. I was supposed to do the swim portion of the tri on Sep 27 with her and her mother and work got in the way. She mailed me my swag and added to my guilt for not being there. She didn't mean to add to my guilt. I do that naturally on my own. Sometimes I wonder if I'm not a closet Catholic with all the guilt I pile on myself needlessly. (And I'm feeling guilty for calling my guilt needless) So I got Dusty a "Life is Good" shirt. I ordered a medium. They sent me a large. I feel guilty for getting the wrong size and I feel guilty that I don't know if I'm going to be able to give it to her next month. I think I need to go to Confession. Do some Hail Marys or something.

In 2 weeks I head to California for the 2nd Annual Dana Point Face to Face. I am so excited. Lucky and I are flying in on Thursday. Friday we're doing the Japanese tourist thing in downtown LA - Hollywood walk of fame, the Hollywood sign, Gorman's (I think that's how it's spelled) theater, Rodeo Drive, the hunt for Harrison Ford, etc. I'm searching for plaid shorts. And a big straw hat. And tube socks to wear with my birks. I'm looking forward to seeing my gals - Kath, Bikey, Dusty, Swabbie, Kel, Lucky and Sun. I hope Pops comes. She's dropped off the face of the earth. She's got a blog so I know she's alive. I wonder if she remembers me. Oh crap - more Hail Marys are being added to my pennance list. And shit - there's another Hail Mary for the cursing. Fuck it. I'll just start the mantra now - maybe by the time the F2F rolls around, I'll be in the black and will have less to do for the F2F stuff - you know, the cursing, the debauchery, the stalking, the Japanese tourist routine.

Tomorrow is a big event day for me with my job. A Stand Down. For homeless Veterans. I've had every nightmare possible about how incredibly fantastic it will fail. That's got to be the closet Catholic coming out in her devil costume. I've done everything possible to make this thing go and I've got lists to check my lists. I just wonder where I left that list. Hmmmm. In any case - my boss and bigger boss and funds grantor will be there tomorrow. I've asked the community service organizations that I'm working with to, at least, refrain from derogertory remarks. That was probably a mistake. The State (my employer) is in a bit of a budget crunch right now. There's talk of downsizing. As much as I'd like to downsize the number on the scale, I'd rather not downsize the number going into my checking account every month. A successful event would at least show some value that I bring my position. Or at least, that's what I tell myself.

I also got a second job. For cash. And to play to my egotism. I'm a waitress at a local pizza joint. 3 days a week, I sling pizza and beer. And I love it. I love the cash. I love being the center of attention for at least 30 minutes per table. But you know what I don't love? People who don't know how to tip. For fuck's sake - doubling the tax is NOT being generous (unless the tax is 15% where you live). I make $4.00 an hour. With the cheapass peeps in my neighborhood, I average $11 hour. Thank GOD I have another job. General rule of thumb for tipping - 20% is standard for good service (the server wasn't rude, condescending or seen spitting in your food - kept your drink filled and ensured the food you ordered was the food you got). 25% is for EXCELLENT service - made you feel the center of the universe. 15% is for non-remarkable service and 10% is for service where you had to call the manager over. And my last public service announcement on this topic - your server just happens to be human. Well, unless you're in Japan being served by monkeys. But have you ever tried to tip in peanuts? They're expensive! I digress. Your server being human means that mistakes can (and will) be made. Your server being human means that some days are better than others. Just like you. A little human compassion will go a long way. And, just in case that doesn't work with you - remember - Karma's a bitch. Crap - there's another 100000000 Hail Marys on my pennance list.

It's late. I have to get up early tomorrow. And Jay Leno is on re-runs. Seriously, the dude takes a crapload of time off. I hope we get tickets to his show.

Good night and have a pleasent tomorrow. Don't forget to tip your servers and bartenders.
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